Some would argue that America is the greatest nation on the planet. These people would ignore some facts but hyperbole is always welcome. The truth is that the nation has a rather troubling two party system.
Troubling? Why do you say that? Could it be that having to always choose between the lesser of two evils is NOT the greatest political system of our age? I mean, I love mustard and I love mayonnaise, but should I really be so restricted in my political and sandwich flavoring options? Where are the Whigs (Worcestershire), Labor Party (BBQ Sauce), Industrialists (Oil & Vinegar) and Socialists (Siracha)? Variety is the spice of life, why must my political system be so bland?
What about the Tea Party, the Left-Wingers and the Green Party?
- The Tea Party = Spicy Brown Mustard (to the Republican yellow)
- The Left-Wingers = Miracle Whip (to the Democrat mayo)
- The Green Party = Well… they say they’re a sauce but we can’t taste anything
The truth is that to survive in a two party system one must shape themselves into a recognizable mass. Though some people will always love a newcomer slinging a “Secret Sauce” they will struggle to find traction with the American public who fears that they are throwing their vote away by asking for Sweet and Sour.
Some Condiment Recipes:
Jimmy Carter’s Spicy Peanut Ketchup:
- 3/4 cup ketchup
- 1/3 cup peanut butter
- 1 lime (Juiced)
- 1 tbsp harissa
- 1/4 tsp coriander
- 1/4 tsp smoked paprika
- 1/4 tsp cinnamon
- 1/4 tsp cayenne
- 3/4 cup ranch dressing
- 1/2 cup grated cucumber
- 1/2 lemon (Juiced)
- 1 Tbsp wasabi paste
Higher Sandwich Theory 